Monday, 21 November 2011

falling in love with strangers

i live in a large city, not as beautiful as the european ones but it still gives me ltos of room to hide and watch passers by. I think i always tend to stare at people though and hope to somehow catch a glimpse of their fac or a smile, id like to let them know that their not alone and that a smile can help get you through that rather odd day that hasn't really dot much excitement and is really not that terribly great.
i hate facebook, i want to talk to people in person, but it's too hard.

high school dreams

constantly i keep having these odd dreams about being back in school,
it starts with me having a shower that takes about an hour, then changing into my unifrom which takes another hour, then i leave in an odd state of terror that i never had before.
Itwas an awful place for me so i wonder why i keep wanting to go back, maybe so i could possibly improve it. It's not something thats uncommon though, so i shouldnt really winge.
Im just glad to be away from there at the moment, and i ca go there in dreams if i really want to.

Wednesday, 16 November 2011

post bright eyes

i went to see another gig on monday night by myself. I almost considered not going because of the stress and huge amount of emotions that are created from these events! i went though, as i think i would of been worse off if i didnt.
It was amazing and i was in the front row, i was sad, angry and happy all so much i thought. I didn't want it to end but i also did so i could go home and relax and rest my back. When itwas over i wanted to go back though and i never wanted it to end. Theres a certain magic that comes with that feeling of finally seeing something in person that you've loved and has helped you get through so many years of a bit of nothing of everyday. I want to be back there now, but im not so i want to travel back there and travel over seas. The everyday now seems awful and pointless to the wonderful excitement i felt when seeing this band. Its the depression that comes after an amazing feeling of love for something thats gone away. Awful and scary it really still hasn't gone away. I want to be more now, and to be seen and maybe heard. Everything i say seems pointless and really not riverting though. It'd be nice to be heard and people to care and maybe people to empathise.
i only really beleive in love because of my parents.

Sunday, 6 November 2011

New artworks!

Ive been dabbeling in all things art of late and here are some of the bits and pieces ive created!
more in my page of art works for 2011!

Saturday, 5 November 2011

A lover i dont have to love

We speak, we eat, we atempt to be deep and all that jazz. Ive been at home alot lately. I finished uni the other day and have been a little ill ever since. So ive decided to rest as much as possible in hope that i shall be completely well by the time i begin my new job as santas helper at christmas time. Im also a little down because my cats are missing, they broke out of the catery and are venutring around the bush near the house where i grew up. Being in sydney away from this house helps me to distract myself from the situaton thought. Im a little hurt and sad, friends help and silly old english tv shows too.

Tuesday, 1 November 2011

slepted in again

Waking up late makes my head go all fuzzy, i over think things and eat too much. I tried going for a walk to the beach, but got cold and left on a bus back home. I then had lunch and did more homework, too much homework. MY way of doing homework envolvs putting a tv series on and doing it on my laptop on the loungeroom floor. IM not terribly exciting but i dont like to be ignored. I can now smell smoke and makes me want to go outdoors. TOmorrow i will get up at 8 and do yoga to make the day start properly again perhaps.