Im back and releived yet terrified with this whole nothing to do. It's a little odd and slightly unsetteling, espeically in the pit of my stomache. Ive been drinking way too much and sleeping way too much. I need to exercise and get out of the house/flat. I need a job, but no one will take me, except and extra agency who i need to pay to get my photo out there. It's scary and weird but i want more to do. I want to feel tired, real tiredness not the silly fake stuff which happens when you have nothing to do.